Adult Partners
Julie had the following response to my hint that the Cub Scout term "adult partner" (used in place of "parent") irritated me in some unspecified way.
I have two students in my class who are foster children. If they were to attend a scout meeting and you referred to their partner as a parent, they probably would explain, "Oh, he's not my dad". Wow! How would it feel to have to say that in front of a group of boys lucky enough to have their biological fathers with them? If acknowledged as an adult partner, no explanation needed, this child is now like everyone else at the meeting and not singled out.
I will now explain the reason for my irritation with things rather than express that they irritate me and leave the reason unclear. Because I agree completely with Julie's observation regarding the importance of being sensitive to the specific
boys in scouts. If I didn't know all the boys in my den, I would use the generic "partners" until I knew if I could use "parents", which is my preference.
The policy per se was not my beef: rather, I am upset at the need to have such a policy. When did we become a culture where boys are considered "lucky" (to use Julie's word) to have their fathers involved with their extra-curricular lives?
Steve and I recently argued about who should receive the benefits of a legally recognized marriage, and my primary argument is that the nuclear (or nu-cu-lar, if you prefer) family is the building block of a stable society: Dad, Mom and child(ren). A government can and should afford extra benefits to its citizens who form themselves into these families, because those families benefit the government (society).
Since I believe we risk destabilizing the entire culture by de-valuing the traditional family, I also believe we are well on our way to you-know-where in the proverbial handbasket. So much so that it is unlikely that boys in a scout group will have a parent involved with them. So we need a policy to address that appalling reality.
God help us.
If You Are Still Reading...
Sponge Bob is not gay. Neither is Buster from the Arthur book series. Of course, nobody said they were, so everyone should just knock if off already.
The problem? Social conservatives view every attempt to discuss "tolerance" in public schools as a Trojan Horse for unleashing an attack on traditional values. Social liberals mock them for being hypersensitive, homophobic, ignorant and - this is the most offensive of all -- exclusive.
Both sides are wrong. Liberals promote "diversity" of every type EXCEPT for diversity of thought: being conservative and traditional are intolerable, for example. Conservatives let their belief in "right" and "wrong" spill over from fundamental matters of faith to areas where tolerance is to be preferred, becoming self-righteous and judgmental instead of humble and loving.
I personally think that "tolerance" is overrated: certain things should not be tolerated.
(That sounds like a terrific slogan for a t-shirt. Maybe I'll have some printed up and sell them online!)
Speaking of Selling Online
It was suggested this week that I should point a link to my fastest rising affiliate, since I was willing to link to my current best selling affiliate and have tolerated Blair's links to his own site.
Agreed. Let the world know their name: TV Products A2Z
The Other Foot's Shoe
Let's imagine for a moment, shall we?
The President selected a woman who is black to be Secretary of State, the first black woman who would serve in that role in the country's history. Her appointment was approved in the Senate, but 13 white senators, lead by a former member of the Ku Klux Klan (Robert Byrd, W.Va.), voted to oppose her.
What if the President had been a Democrat, and the white Senators Republicans?
Hmmm, let's imagine. Every race-baiting, hate-mongering civil liberties spokesperson in the country would be demanding impeachment, if not criminal charges, for the Senators. Major papers across the fruited plain would have front page headlines outraged over the unmistakable discrimination.
But the President is a Republican, and the Senators Democrats, so there was not a peep in all the land.
Strunk and White - My Heroes!
For my 41st birthday I received the book "Elements of Style" by William Strunk, Jr. and E.B. White, (yes - THAT E.B. White).
Technically speaking, it is an English language textbook that contains elementary rules of usage, principles of composition and commonly misused words and expressions. Others might scoff at such an offering, but I am thrilled. How could you not love the following advice from "Chapter V: An Approach to Style"?
Put yourself in the background.
Do not affect a breezy manner.
Avoid fancy words.
Prefer the standard to the offbeat.
Be clear.
It may not do anything for you, dear reader, but I love it!
Valentine's Day Placemats
I came home from work the other day to find the Valentine's Day decorations had been retrieved from the attic and placed throughout the house. Coming into the kitchen through the garage door, the first thing I noticed was the pink and red, heart- and cupid-covered placemats on the kitchen table. Because of the way my mind works, I was reminded of something we learned at Brite Divinity School in a class on worship.
The different seasons of the church are identified by their association with specific colors and symbols: white at Easter, evergreens at Christmas, etc. Our professor suggested the presence of these colors and symbols in the church was a powerful and important reminder of the current season. The seasons, he argued, were cyclical and reassuring reminders of the continuity of the church and the orderliness of God's creation. "To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under heaven." Ecclesiastes 3:1 The colors and symbols remind you where you are in the world.
Our boys grow up in a house where the year is broken up into seasons, too, each one represented by its designated colors and symbols. Each season is a period of anticipation for something wonderful which marks the end of that season, but the beginning of a new season. For example, the current Valentine's Day decorations will go up to the attic the same day the Easter decorations come down.
If I may extrapolate from my seminary lesson, then Austin and Braden experience the world as somewhat more secure, more joyful, more predictable because of the colors and symbols Shelley uses to decorate our home. Each time the Valentine's placemats come out, the boys know a breakfast party for the school kids in our neighborhood is approaching, as well as chocolates and goodies from their grandparents. Easter decorations foretell church, extended family and baskets of more goodies. And the Christmas decorations - well, forget about it!
How lucky (there's that word again!) they are to have a Mom who marks their lives with symbols and colors of the seasons. To grow up knowing where you are in the world, to look forward constantly to a celebration, to experience life as reassuring and predictable: these are all good things for our boys, and a great blessing to witness.
Happy February!
4 comments:
Funny thing...I read this posting which mentions Elements of Style, then started reading Stephen King's On Writing and he references the hell out of that book. Looks like I'll be reading Elements of Style next. Thanks for the tip!
You and I are in total agreement...certain things should not be tolerated.
As I was traveling north on I-35 last Friday, I scanned through the dial on the radio in an attempt to find something interesting enough to keep me from drowsiness. As the 3 second audio blips came through, I heard a talk radio person make a reference to "all those anti-God liberals", and the scan continued on.
I fervently wished at that moment that the person spouting those words of incrimination would take one Sunday to visit my church.
Were he to visit my chosen house of worship, he would be warmly welcomed. He would hear the congregation sing traditional hymns, hear the Lord’s prayer, see young children gather offerings of canned food, toiletries, school supplies for the community service of the month, hear scripture read from both the old and new testament, and prayer on behalf of the hurting world. He would hear a dynamic minister preach a message of Jesus’ example for all people. He would be invited to participate in communion regardless of his political opinions or personal spiritual beliefs, the color of his skin, his country of origin, any mental or physical disability, or his chosen profession. He would be assured that God loves him.
He would also be invited to join us in our activities of the week. Perhaps he would like to visit the Travis County correctional center for women on Tuesday. Maybe he would prefer to help serve a hot meal, or sleep in the facility to assist homeless families who are housed in a “sister church”. He might also choose to help our volunteers prepare bags of food and toiletries, then take them to homeless folks huddling under our city bridges.
Oh, but wait, we just might offend him. We are the anti-God people he spoke of. We didn’t vote Republican.
Kerry’s two cents worth, part two
As you well know, dear brother, opinions are not something I’m short on and debate is inspiring to me. I’d like to offer some thoughts to counter some of your statements.
The political parties in our country are both shameful. Each slings accusations, and degradations at the other, name-calling and trying to better their own position in the political arena. What they don’t understand is that we, the people, are tired of it all. We, the people are getting lost in the drama of our leadership’s mindless pursuit of power. That is something none of us “people” should tolerate.
It was stated in your message, that one political group does not tolerate diversity of thought. I agree wholeheartedly. The very tenet of current conservatism in our country is “the right way to be”. Conservatives have a definition for the way people should believe, and behave. As long as one conforms to “the right way to be”, the conservative way, then one is accepted.
If a person does not conform to the conservative definition of “normal”, then he or she is denied the basic human right to commit himself/herself in marriage to a person they love, or is legislated out of the precious gift of parenthood. He/she is labeled immoral. Those who support them are condemned. Some of those who condemn, do so while dining with their mistresses, or divorcing their wives and abandoning their children.
If a woman stands up for her own needs and rights, and makes the best informed decision for her own future, she is told she does not matter as much as her unviable unborn. She is labeled inhuman. Those who support her are condemned. Some of those who condemn, do so while procreating the unborn without responsibility.
If a person values the constitution of our land, which says all people may worship in the manner of their beliefs without the interference of the government, then asks the school district not to force their children to pray over a highschool football game, they are labeled anti-God. Those who support them are condemned. Some of those who condemn, pray and worship no differently than their adversaries.
If a person does not vote in a certain way, does not agree with the agenda of the national leadership, does not believe war is the best answer to problems, he/she is labeled anti-American. Those who support them are condemned. Some of those who condemn have chosen to ignore their own conservative moral teachings and our nation’s constitution.
As soon as one does not conform to the narrow definitions of any one “conservative” view, they are labeled wrong, immoral, anti-American, and now, anti-God. Talk about exclusive! And yes, that is offensive!
One last thought ….regarding your comments about Condoleeza Rice. She has been recognized and rewarded for her intelligence and integrity. She is a token black female among the elite, white, males of our national leadership. One must be grateful for baby steps.
Peace to you
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