South Padre - The Final Chapter

Our final day at the beach was spent mostly under the shade of the beach umbrella after spending the morning at the swimming pool. The pool occupied the space immediately to the west of the condos, so we swam and played and acted silly in the shade of the morning sun. When mid-day hit, we went inside for lunch, an SPF full-body treatment, and then on to the beach. Sheila, who hadn't been feeling well all morning, became increasingly sick to her stomach and miserable. She stayed very still in bed while Braden napped, allowing Austin and me to build a sandcastle.

Actually, saying what Austin and I built was a sandcastle is really a bit misleading. What we did was dig a square hole about 6'x 6' around the base of the umbrella, leaving a 1' square in the center where the umbrella remained firmly anchored in the sand. "Umbrellaville", as Austin came to call it, was about 18" deep, or exactly the depth to which you had to dig to get to the tarry, black layer of petrochemical residue. To call Umbrellaville "quaint" or "charming" would be plain wrong. It would not be wrong, however, to call it a democracy. You see, Austin soon began to designate the larger shells we dug up as members of Umbrellaville's city council, which operated out of the 1' square in the center of "town". As duly elected guardians of the city, they were responsible for overseeing construction, as well as composing a pledge of allegiance, (with our help). We spent several hours working on the development of U-ville, only to witness it's massive devastation at the hands of - who else - Braden. In fairness to B's already sullied reputation, he was invited to help destroy our work with the help of his older brother.

After washing up, and with Shelley feeling slightly better, we went to our favorite place to eat in Padre - Louie's Back Porch. The food was so bad, even I had a hard time eating it, and their are cast iron skillets jealous of how solid my stomach is. To add to our misery, it was still unbelievably hot, we sat out in the sun on the patio (felt odd wearing sunglasses at dinner), our table was dirty and sticky, the cold foods were warm and the hot foods were warm, too. And NONE of it tasted good. All of this was no good for Shelley's belly, to say the least. The only bright spot, (besides the reflection of the sun off my ever-expanding forehead), was Austin's recollection of the time at Louie's that a sea gull flew overhead and pooped on Dad's face and glasses. I'm sure Dad remembers the incident with much less fondness than we did that night, but the memory of it still cracks Austin up pretty good.

After "dinner", we went back to the beach with our flashlights and proceeded to unleash the force of nature that is Braden on the unsuspecting sand crabs which foolishly wandered out of their underground safe havens into our path. It was dusk, so flashlights were required to see the crabs, but once they were spotted, Braden dropped to his knees and began scurrying about after them with surprising quickness. He actually caught a few before the toll his "handling" was having on the local crab population began to alarm his mother and me. Sheila then demonstrated the compassionate way to "catch and release" sand crabs, and Braden remained fascinated by the little guys until it became too dark to spot them, even with flashlights.

Back at the condo, there were more chocolate chip cookies to bake, more ice cream to eat, and more games to play before it was off to sleep.

The next morning we spent a little time in the pool before cleaning up, packing and shaking the sand off of our garmets (literally and figuratively) as we left town to return to humbler but happier confines.

The trip home took FOREVER, but there were a few highlights. We stopped at a roadside fruit stand north of Harlingen and bought three large jugs with which we intend to build a fountain/pond once the weather cools off a little. We cracked ourselves up at a Border Guard checkpoint several miles further up from Harlingen, "worrying" that they might ask us some awkward questions about why three sunburned Anglos would be travelling away from the Mexico border with a brown-skinned toddler onboard.

And, at Austin's pleading, we took a slight detour to pass through Goliad, site of the Presidio de La Bahia, the oldest, fully intact fort dating from the Texas Revolution. Here Austin recounted for us, with remarkable detail, the story of the Goliad Massacre. It was just outside this fort where General James Fannin and 342 of his men were executed by the ruthless Mexican General Santa Anna in violation of the terms of surrender they negotiated. It was a very interesting place with an incredible history, originally built by the Spanish to protect their territory against the pesky French wandering about from their Lousiana Territories. And I did not know it until this visit, but the battle cry of the Texas Revolutionaries at San Jacinto, (site of Santa Anna's defeat at the hands of a much smaller army), was 'Remember the Alamo, Remember La Bahia'.***

But the best part of our tour was Austin's demeanor, which was equal parts fascination and reverence. He became outraged - I'm using the word outraged here - at the site of some ketchup which someone had spilled at the base of the Fannin memorial, because it showed such a lack of understanding about the seriousness and importance of the ground on which we were standing. He was as respectful and solemn as a veteran the whole time we were at the fort and we absolutely love that about him.

Of course, the mood was completely lost when, on the walkway back to the parking lot, Braden stopped, pulled down his shorts and began peeing on the grass before any of us noticed he had fallen behind. Mercifully, no state employees nor fellow visitors happened to see his misdemeanor defacing of an historical site. It also goes without saying that NO ONE wanted to hear me discourse on Oklahoma state history, leaving my question 'who can name for me the five civilized tribes' unanswered and without an expression of interest in knowing the answer.

That was our trip. Glad I got that written so I can move on to July 4th at Destin, Florida. That's next time.


*** For those of you reading this who were taught Oklahoma state history (so therefore don't know much about Texas state history), and are furthermore inclined to believe that I would just as soon lie as tell the truth, I recommend to you this site, which will verify that what I have written above is, in fact, the truth. And shame on you, by the way...